Not The Mom I Used To Be

 

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I used to be~

I used to be more patient.

I used to be more fun.

I used to be more giving.

I used to be more gentle.

I used to be more kind.

I used to be more carefree.

I used to be so much more.

Now I am~

Now I am lucky to get through an hour without yelling.

Now I struggle to enjoy moments with my kids.

Now I wonder why I had kids if this was to be our life.

Now I am intolerant.

Now I am impatient.

Now I struggle to laugh.

Now I am not the mom I thought I would be.

I want to be~

I want so much to enjoy these days, months, and years with them because they are going by so quickly.

I want so much to be the fun mom.

I want so much to be loved by them.

I want so much to be appreciated.

I want so much to be happy.

I want so much to skip the hard years of parenting.

I want so much to be a confident mom.

I want so much to like who I am as a mom.

 

I am a mom.  I love my children more than anything in this world.  I am my worse critic.  I am human.  I wouldn’t trade all these struggles for anything.  I will continue to trudge through this thing called motherhood.  I will continue to make mistakes and beat myself up over all of them. I will be the mom I was meant to be.

 

2 thoughts on “Not The Mom I Used To Be

  1. Thank you 🙂 I know a lot of moms feel there is something wrong with feeling some of these feelings but there isn’t anything wrong about it. I had a conversation in the grocery store with a friend this past week who had a bad morning with her one child. The relief on her face when she realized she wasn’t alone was one of many things that prompted me to share this. I have had this started and revised many times before sharing. We are moms and parenting is hard especially these “not so fun” years (tweens-teens).

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